Today

TODAY
Sunday, the day I go to Sunday School and Church. I like the people, I look forward to church....usually. Today, I don't feel like going. I am feeling low, which means I must put a smile on my face and act interested in other people, and like I have not a care in the world. If only that were true. But it is not. I have bills that are piling up fast and I hope that by blogging I will see how God is working in my life instead of always feeling like he has his thumb on me pushing me to the ground. He promised to supply all my needs, but all I see so far in my life is that promise and not the reality of it.

It doesn't help that a friend of mine is out of town, we have been good friends. I don't like how I am feeling because he is gone and I am not with him. Probably it is because I am feeling left out. We are just good friends.We just have a common bond that brings us very close.

I will go to church....I know that once I go I will feel better. I have such a spirit of heaviness in my life. Is it spiritual or physical. The depression I battle sometimes seems too heavy to deal with. But then I go to a good praise and worship service and I feel like I can beat it.